IS LOVE ENOUGH
As I get older and continue to see that true “love” is presence, I do wonder if that kind of love is enough. Presence is kind of blank to the world of thought based living. Showing up is great, but is it lost in the world of judgement and comparing. How does one see someone just “showing up present”?
Does that feeling of caring get lost in the day to day struggle and busyiness? Does the love have to be expressed in some other way to make sense in that world? You wonder when you think that you are getting closer to not being here. (good news with my cardiologist today who said my heart is in good shape, so no obit here) But, you still wonder if just looking and being with someone is getting the message across.
Do we need to give each other more in this world than a presence? Do all the words “I mean” mean the same to you? Do we wear out the sayings which always fall short of the feeling behind them? Are words of love, really ever enough. And, if not, what then?
Looking with love at someone you deeply care about, can just be a stare, if the door is not open on the other end. Do we always need the words to convey something that is beyond “words”. I wonder about that when I know there is not a whole lot of time left.
You do not want to die without things unsaid, but what about when “things said” are not enough. When the word does not capture the feeling of connection, and there is nothing left to say. Are we open to the unsaid, to the feeling of being with another? When the façade is down, we experience a closeness that certainly goes beyond the word.
But that only works, when both sides are down. A direct connection with another is the greatest thing in life, and as I get older, I wish to leave that understanding behind. Be with another, and maybe they will “be” with you. We cannot control the other, but only our side of that.
This is the kind of love that the poets and the prophets have always written about. We mostly turn that into words of love. And words of love have their place, but “being” is above all that. I wish all of you “being in love” in the way I am trying to explain. Words fail me. Tlane 5/7/18
As a veteran of a 48-year relationship, I know exactly what you mean. Beyond presence, Love requires a creative nod, touch, word, gift, aid, response that the other can pick up on, especially in the tough times.